Too Immersed in Women
by they're only words
Summary: .:In the Land of Women:. '...if I ever go back to L.A., things will definitely be different than they were before.' Carter thinks about the women he has met while caring for his grandmother.


Disclaimer-I do not own In the Land of Women, and no copyright infringement was intended.

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"So I guess we're done, right?"

"Yeah, we're done." I turn around and try to walk away. God, that girl needs to grow up. Which, I realize, may sound strange coming from me, but I can see how immature she was. The growing up that I need to do is different than the growing up she needs to do. Maybe her behavior is typical for most high school students. Everyone at East L.A. High was trying to grow up quickly and act mature. Maybe I was a little harsh with her. I probably shouldn't have said it that way. She needs to be woken up, but still. I turn around to apologize, only to see her running at me.

Before I can react, she's in my arms, kissing me. Her lips are so soft, and for a moment I just enjoy the moment. Then, I remember myself. I'm nine years older than her. I've kissed her mother. I gently pull away from her and head inside my grandmother's house.

As I lay in bed, I think about what I just did. If I'm completely honest with myself, I'd probably admit that I could've avoided this, and it will probably get very messy. Then again, that's life. Like I just tried to tell Lucy, life is messy and chaotic.

That first night, if I hadn't been nice about her smoking, if I had just told her, "Sure, no problem," and walked back inside the house, she wouldn't have these sorts of feelings. If I hadn't been funny and nice she wouldn't have been attracted to me. If I had agreed with her, that going out with her was the last thing I wanted to do, then I wouldn't be involved here. But I did want to go out with her. Is that wrong? I knew she was a fair amount younger than me that first night, and yet I still wanted to go out with her. She seemed like an interesting person, like an interesting distraction from Sofia.

Sofia. Now there's a mess. I'm completely in love with the woman, and she can't see it, or reciprocate it. Sometimes, I honestly don't know why I love her. She's selfish a lot of the time, and, as stated before, she doesn't fully appreciate me. Maybe I'm in love with the idea of her. Or, maybe not even the idea of her, but the idea of love. That sounds like me, being in love with the idea of being in love. She just happened to be there, and available to love.

I came out here to try and avoid women for a little bit. I'm too immersed in women for my life not to be confusing. Of course, my grandmother's house just had to be across the street from two beautiful, confused women. And, both of them just had to be drawn to me. And, I just had to be drawn to both of them.

Sarah, the beautiful, misunderstood housewife. There was so much more to her than her family sees. She's much deeper than Lucy appreciates. Maybe that's just part of her teenage rebellion. And her husband, Nelson, what is wrong with him? If I was married to a woman that beautiful and interesting and easy to talk to, I sure as hell wouldn't be sleeping with another woman.

Lucy, the angsty teenager. She has essentially created the conflict with her mother on her own, just for the sake of conflict. If she would just talk to Sarah, she would see that things aren't nearly as bad as she likes to pretend. Maybe Sarah should've held out on the news that she was going to be fine, just for a little bit longer. Maybe Lucy would've appreciated her more if she thought she was going to lose her.

And Paige. She's too adorable. She wants to be all grown up, like she thinks her sister is, but she's already more mature than her sister in so many ways. She understands her mother much better than Lucy probably ever will, which is sad. Maybe she just wants to be a teenager so that people will listen to her more. People have a tendency to write off what kids say, like it's not important. So she's gathering all this information from everywhere, so that, on the off chance that someone does listen to her, she can sound informed.

My grandmother, now there's an interesting story. She's convinced she's dying, even though the doctors can't find anything wrong with her. I would say that she's doing it for the attention, but she doesn't seem to want anyone to talk to her. She acts like she just wants to be left alone. I have no idea what's going on there. It has been interesting living with her though. She definitely brings new insights on how insignificant my problems are.

As confusing as living around all of these women has been, I don't think I'd trade it, if I was given the choice. They're all so amazing in their own way. I love all of them in different ways as well. I just hope that they all find their "happy ending," because I know that I won't be able to help there. Maybe I should talk to Nelson, make him see what he's doing to Sarah. And, maybe push Lucy in Eric's direction. He seems like a nice kid. And, he seems to really like her. He did punch his best friend in the face for her. I don't know how things are going to work out, but I know that if I ever go back to L.A., they will definitely be different than they were before.


End file.
